Placing Perception Before Reality

On NBC’s Today Show, Defense Secretary Robert Gates tipped the proverbial hand of the Obama administration when it comes to priorities with regard to the Global War on Terror, political correctness, and matters of national security. While his statement was not so much a revelation as a confirmation, it was nonetheless distressing.

In speaking about the terrorist detainee facility at the U.S. naval base in Guantanamo Bay, Cuba, and defending the president’s decision to hold steadfast in advocating its closure, Gates confirmed that indeed this administration places reputation higher on the priority list than national security.

“The truth is, it’s probably one of the finest prisons in the world today,” Gates said. “But, it has a taint. The name itself is a condemnation.”

That Gates at all felt the need to mention that, despite being an excellent facility for the purpose it now serves, Gitmo should be shuttered because of a “taint” means that this administration is permitting the perceived outward perception of the United States and our foreign policy to dictate national security policy.

That’s not only inappropriate – that’s downright dangerous.

Perhaps, if Guantanamo Bay has such a taint but otherwise fulfills its purpose, this administration can merely rename it, much like it changed “Global War on Terror” to “Overseas Contingency Operation” or even “terrorism” itself to “man-caused disaster.” I propose, in that vein, that the new name for the terrorist detainee facility in Guantanamo Bay be: “The Happy Land of the Bearded, Questionable Slappywags.”

Obviously, “happy” has its own lovely, benign connotation, and “bearded” is just an observation about the current inhabitants of the wonderful place. The addition of “questionable” is necessary, of course, to accommodate those of us on the political right that want to ensure that some modicum of distinguishing between good and evil be maintained, just like Obama’s folks thought to include “contingency” in “Overseas Contingency Operation,” instead of going with the original idea of re-labeling the Global War on Terror the “Overseas Capitulation Operation.” And “slappywags?” Well, since nobody knows what a “slappywag” is, such a label could provide valuable flexibility when dealing with the current inhabitants of the Happy Land of the Bearded, Questionable Slappywags–as in: “Of course, slappywags have always been provided with the same constitutional rights as all Americans” or “slappywags have never been considered under the purview of the Geneva Conventions”–and would provide for a whole new stable of human rights organizations, such as the NAABS (the National Association for the Advancement of Bearded Slappywags) or NALBSL (the National Association for Liberal-Bearded Slappywag Love).

If you haven’t figured out that I’m being hopelessly ridiculous, then perhaps you need to read it again. I have a point, however — this entire idea of renaming facilities and programs and ideas and concepts is pointless. This administration either values the outward perception of its policies more than the safety and security of the American people or it does not. It either proceeds to fight radical Islamic jihad, or it does not. Right now, on both accounts, it seems like the latter.

Closing the facility at Guantanamo Bay has no conceivable, rational, logical upside. This facility was built solely for the purpose for which it is now used, albeit begrudgingly, by this administration. And while Gates may have argued that the facility will serve “as an advertisement for Al Qaeda as long as its open,” such an argument ignores the fact that radical Islamic jihad stems not from the actions of the United States of America, but from the freedoms and the values and the faiths the United States of America enjoys and embraces. To argue that, somehow, it was the establishment of the facility at Guantanamo Bay that brought upon the manifestation of thousands of years of radical Islamic aggression is tantamount to saying that childhood obesity caused Kraft Macaroni & Cheese to be tasty, cheap, and easy to make, and not the other way around.

Every day that this administration continues in its perverted prosecution of the Global War on Terror makes the United States of America less safe. Putting political correctness and global acceptance before the safety and security of America and the American people must stop, before innocent people get killed in a man-caused disaster.

Image by the great folks at Cox & Forkum.



  1. Roses, WA says:

    Mr Gates should have considered just who ‘tainted’ the name, and why. I would guess the trial lawyers who want a piece of the TV circus action here in the stateside courts.

  2. Gail B says:

    This “transparent” regime has more cloaks than Sherlock Holmes’s closet!

    Obama’s regime has yet to explain HOW the Gagging Stimulus Constipating Bill will help the economy by spending millions on San Fran Nan’s pet rats; it has YET to explain anything to the satisfaction of the American voter/citizen. It has YET to explain WHY it is so freaking necessary to close Gitmo. The Big Dictator has yet to disclose how he is not a usurper at the Resolute Desk.

    Just as when he campaigned, O said NOTHING. He gave pep talks. Following Alinsky’s “Rules for Radicals,” he took a recession and called it something it was not: a crisis, and created a platform with the middle-class people that made them believe THEY could make things better for them by voting for him alone! “A light will shine down from ABOVE (not Heaven), and you will say I must vote for Obama.” (Or something on that order.)

    Obama is diluting the threat ONLY in people’s minds. If they aren’t terrorists, and he can get them onto US soil, maybe he can sign them up with ACORN or his future Brown Shirts.

    I hear it now: “Well, Obama said they aren’t terrorists…. They must be okay. He has even given them a Presidential Pardon!”

    For Obama or anyone else to do ANYTHING, there is a goal. If you get up out of your chair, you do so for a reason.


    Y’all, I apologize for writing something close to a column in these comment sections, but I used to write for a newspaper. I guess it’s in my blood.

  3. Roses, WA says:

    Hey Gail, I used to write letters to editors so I think in 200 word limits :-)

  4. RAD says:

    An appropriate question to ask Mr. Gates is why that facility is tainted and who did the tainting. The screeching from the radical left – of which President Obama is a lifelong member – is the reason for the taint. Now the President wants to be the hero and remove the awful thoughts of Gitmo from out collective memory. Talk about self fulfilling prophecy. Nice.

  5. CHOKE ON A JOKE says:

    I never wrote for a paper, I’m a man of few words, so I just “BAM” em with a hit-and-run joke and press the PUBLISH YOUR COMMENT button. My dream job would be to have a show like Jon Stewart but from the conservative angle.

  6. Anonymous says:


    “Slappywaggs”? Were you slapphappy do to your recent lack of sleep?

    HA HA HA HA HA!!!

    I thought that was hilarious, and the acronyms were priceless!

    BTW…I think we should have a speedreader for EVERY bill! Or better yet, how ’bout an AUCTIONEER?

    Or a COMEDIAN would be nice, due to all the tension on the legislative floor. They could make jokes about each earmark!

    Lisa in TX

  7. PSYDOG says:

    “The Audacity of a Dope” strikes again. Gitmo came into being “after” 9/11. The Islamofascists hated us way before Gitmo. I love the fact that the Demo controlled House is trying to make a concerted effort to shut the closure down because the White House doesn’t have a plan for the inhabitants. Hold the White House’s feet to the fire!

  8. Mick says:

    Obama is Not a Natural Born Citizen and not loyal to this country. All polititians on either side that allowed it to happen have the blood of the constitution on their hands.

  9. Lilly says:

    “The Happy Land of the Bearded, Questionable Slappywags.”

    Jeff, I just spit coffee all over my keyboard! Didn’t Gates disagree with BO before also? Maybe he’s wanting to keep it open, so slowly making small comments like these will help. I don’t know, just thinking without much coffee yet.

  10. Anonymous says:

    To all of the many, many patriots here, it’s time to please stand up and make your voices HEARD, in every venue in the land. I am going to stand up in church this Sunday and speak, and I am going to ask everyone in church to stand up and speak to everyone they know. Then I am going to visit other churches, and stand up and speak.
    We DO have a voice.
    We’re just not using it.
    Don’t just sit there and listen this Sunday. Stand up and speak. (No teleprompter needed).
    You CAN do it.
    PLEASE stand up for God, and stand up for America.
    This is an E mail below that I just sent out to everyone I know, all over the country.

    First this short video:

    This video is incredible.
    I wish he was our president.
    That is how a United States president should speak.
    We have got to get rid of this muslim usurper, worthless to his very core, and it is becoming more and more evident that he is not even an American citizen, and he is simply intent on destroying our American republic.
    If he didn’t have to something to hide, after all, why would he spend over a million dollars so far to keep his documents hidden and sealed away??!
    That’s simply not even common sense…..

    A lot of reading, but this man makes it very clear, if you’d like –

    Hope you’re all doing well.
    God loves you.

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