Apparently, he had just heard Rush Limbaugh read it on his radio show. Now, I normally wouldn’t consider running something simply because Limbaugh found it important — but I found this to be absolutely, positively hilarious.
It’s Jeremy Clarkson’s review, for the London Times, of Honda’s new Insight Hybrid. Now, just because I am a global warming skeptic doesn’t mean that I wouldn’t consider driving a good hybrid. In fact, I’ve enjoyed every Honda and Acura I have driven, and I’ll admit that I’ve been looking at the Insight with interest (as if I had the money to purchase it!). Still, after reading this absolutely side-splitting review, I think it’s off the list.
Furthermore, it should serve as a harbinger of what’s to come in terms of driving American roads. Government control will lead to substandard transport — after all, what has government ever done exceptionally well?
Anyway, that’s enough of my blowhardiness. The whole reason I wanted to reproduce this here was because of the laugh value. Enjoy:
It’s terrible. Biblically terrible. Possibly the worst new car money can buy. It’s the first car I’ve ever considered crashing into a tree, on purpose, so I didn’t have to drive it any more.
The biggest problem, and it’s taken me a while to work this out, because all the other problems are so vast and so cancerous, is the gearbox. For reasons known only to itself, Honda has fitted the Insight with something called constantly variable transmission (CVT).
It doesn’t work. Put your foot down in a normal car and the revs climb in tandem with the speed. In a CVT car, the revs spool up quickly and then the speed rises to match them. It feels like the clutch is slipping. It feels horrid.
And the sound is worse. The Honda’s petrol engine is a much-shaved, built-for-economy, low-friction 1.3 that, at full chat, makes a noise worse than someone else’s crying baby on an airliner. It’s worse than the sound of your parachute failing to open. Really, to get an idea of how awful it is, you’d have to sit a dog on a ham slicer.
So you’re sitting there with the engine screaming its head off, and your ears bleeding, and you’re doing only 23mph because that’s about the top speed, and you’re thinking things can’t get any worse, and then they do because you run over a small piece of grit.
There’s more. Normally, Hondas feel as though they have been screwed together by eye surgeons. This one, however, feels as if it’s been made from steel so thin, you could read through it. And the seats, finished in pleblon, are designed specifically, it seems, to ruin your skeleton. This is hairy-shirted eco-ism at its very worst.
Read the entire review HERE.